Category: Stoopid Criminulz

Stories that remind us of why criminal defense lawyers do what we do! Remember, a fairy tale begins, “Once upon a time . . .”, and a criminal defense lawyer’s war story begins, “You aint gonna believe this . . . !” If you have a TRUE and VERIFIABLE stupid criminal story, e-mail me at joe@bodifordlaw with the details.

California Couple Used a Drone to Deliver Drugs (from Time)

Authorities say a drone delivered drugs to customers at a nearby parking lot. The customers would then drive by the couple’s home and throw their payments on the lawn.

One wonders what some people could do with their lives if they put their minds to that, rather than finding ways to break the law.

Source: California Couple Used a Drone to Deliver Drugs: Police | Time

Just one more question on Debra Lafave – St. Petersburg Times

Just one more question on Debra Lafave – St. Petersburg Times.

Great column by Sue Carlton.  She asks why a judge would let a probationer off probation early, when the original plea deal called for the probationer to do the entire probation sentence.  No early termination.

I have routinely seen judges refuse to terminate probation sentences where there was a “no early termination” clause in the plea.  That means that in order to get the probation sentence to begin with (as opposed to jail), the defendant had to agree to do the whole probation.  Agreed to 5 years?  Then you’re doing 5 years.

Lafave is, as usual, an exception to every rule.  I want to know why she was permitted to terminate her probation in the face of an agreement not to, when so many clients I have seen are required to do the whole thing.  So what if you have nothing left but time (no community service left to do, no costs left to pay . . .), you have to do it.  It’s ridiculous.

I hope that the State Attorney’s Office will look closely at the Lafave situation.  Personally, I couldn’t give less of a rat’s ass about Debra Lafave.  But I am concerned that the State Attorney’s Office may look the other way on this one when holding everyone else’s feet to the fire.

We are all entitled to some answers:  State Attorney, tell us why you are not going to fight this (if you aren’t) . . . if not, then don’t object the next time anyone other than Lafave tries to get off of probation.

Deputies: Lawn mower thief left Amscot receipt at scene – St. Petersburg Times





Deputies: Lawn mower thief left Amscot receipt at scene – St. Petersburg Times.

A guy tried to tow another guy’s lawn mower out of his yard . . . ALLEGEDLY.

Only in Pasco County.  Well, maybe in Polk County, too, but that would have ended in a shoot out. . .

There are several interesting things about this article.  First, the alleged thief “left his calling card” at the scene – an AmScot receipt with his name on it.  That’s how they tracked him down.

Second, he immediately cut the mower loose from his car, apologized, and left.  The alleged thief thought the mower was “scrap.”

Third, this is Pasco County, which raises the question of whether it is unreasonable to think that a mower left in someone’s front yard is junk or not.  I suppose the answer to that depends on how high the unmowed grass in front of the trailer is, and how rusty the mower is (parked next to the pink lawn flamingo and sofa, of course).

Finally, what raises my interest the most is the question of whether taking junk, trash, garbage, or other waste from someone’s lawn is even a crime.  If there is no value to the item, can it be “stolen”?  Under Florida criminal law, something doesn’t have to have any value to be owned, but it has to have some value in order to be considered stolen.

Think about this the next time you want to go on someone’s property and take that old computer they have laying next to the garbage . . .  you may get charged with a crime!

By the way, if he had gotten money at AmScot, why would he need to steal anything, anyway?  Only in Pasco County.